can turn an untrained user into a pro musician…Instantly!!!

[kensuguro]

This has got to be the boldest claim of the century..

http://cgi.ebay.com/Complements-MIDI-So ... dZViewItem

This is NOT an automatic accompaniment or a loop program, but instead an incredibly powerful tool that can turn an untrained user into a pro musician…Instantly!!! It was designed from the ground up by professional record producers to be so easy to use that a manual is normally not even required. Songs can be made very quickly and easily, with total creative control, and with no knowledge of music theory required!!

ok, so it is some sort of accompaniment generation thingy.. but I just love the extreme claim.

some more I came up with:
"Become smart INSTANTLY! Not just normal smart, but the better kind."

"Turns anyone into a high powered V8 engine INSTANTLY! Order one now, and get 5 wives!"

"Can easily earn any one an education, INSTANTLY! So easy that you can get up, have breakfast, get 3 college degrees, do the groceries, get some more education, do the laundry, have lunch, and get education with the whole family for desert! Order while supplies last"

"Loose 200 pounds INSTANTLY! Look human! Fit into human clothes! Be mobile! Innovative diet allows you to eat what you want, when you want, how you want. Double fried butter dipped in cheese? No problemo. Sugar coated chocolate sandwiched between custard smothered chocolate, dipped in lard? No problemo! Don't be fat, be thin."

[astroman]

they still sell that old fart ??? must be around for > 10 years

[Stubbe]

Tom Waits' Step Right Up from the album Small Change springs to mind...

[H-Rave]

You could of course stick your finger up your arse and whistle.The result would be Comparable,Musically speaking,and cheaper.

[manfriday]

ken you missed the most obvious one!

"It's so easy a one-armed drummer can use it!"