The European people unite!

Immanuel · Post by **Immanuel** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 11:45 am

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the European Union rather than German,
which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's
Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement
and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as
"Euro-English".
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make
the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favor of
the 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less
letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
troublesome 'ph' will be replased with the 'f'. This will make words like
'fotograf' 20% shorter!
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments
will enkorage the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent
to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent'e'
in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with
'z' and 'w' wiz 'v'. During ze fifz year ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from
vords kontaining 'ou' and similar changes vud of kurs be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters. After ze fifz yer ve vil hav a rali sensibl ritn
styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evriun vil find it ezi tu
undrstand ech ozer.
Zen Z Drem Vil Finali Kum Tru !!!

Mr Arkadin · Post by **Mr Arkadin** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 12:30 pm

spoimala · Post by **spoimala** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 1:10 pm

zis is prety much startin to lok like writen polish and to lok like pronunset finish

astroman · Post by **astroman** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 3:04 pm

borg · Post by **borg** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 3:26 pm

don't you get it? i smell some french lobbying... de madona wif de big boobies iz hidden in de sosidge

samplaire · Post by **samplaire** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 4:14 pm

'fotograf' 20% shorter!

what's so funny about it? We use this word in this particular form for ages (aaaa - for years, since the first photo, hehe) dys ys pur Polish

zis is prety much startin to lok like writen polish and to lok like pronunset finish

What do you mean, Spoimala? If you meant countries you would have written Polish instead of polish and Finnish instead of finish. But it fits the Immanuel's finish of polishing English

_________________
Sir Sam Plaire Scopernicus

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: samplaire on 2003-08-14 17:15 ]</font>

Immanuel · Post by **Immanuel** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 4:27 pm

I liked that series borg. I shall say this only once

But try and imagine the French language put thru the same procedure as described above

Post by **hubird** » Thu Aug 14, 2003 6:48 pm

haha, great review Immanuel!

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Let There Be Dutch!

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: hubird on 2003-08-14 19:48 ]</font>