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A brief tale of how things went last weekend.
I saw my Mother (who is in the end stage of COPD and been in the ICU for 4 months on a ventilator as well as going into 100% failure, each time they have tried to wien her off of it, this is the last time they will take her off, then she will not be reconnected, for a stage 2 and stage 3 DNR orders have been set in place), on Friday & then again on Saturday, sent my brother & sister out of the room, closed the door, buried the hatched, told her I forgive her & that I loved her. She began to cry....I told her it was ok sssshhhhh....ssssshhhhhh...everything is going to be fine with us. Gave her a kiss, then a peace sign, held it up while I backed out of the room slowly. That is the last time I will ever see her again.

Got into the rental and drove to State College, where I repeated the same...asked by brother and sister to excuse me, closed the door, said to my father (who was the best man at my wedding) He said "You're a sad sight for sore eyes" Then I told him "You now I love you" He said..."I never doubted that for a minute" Which is actually pretty amazing...he can't really talk or walk from suffering from the end stages of Lewy Body Disease. He drifted in and out for a few minutes...he came back, and I told him "I would not be who or where I am, if it were not for the lessons I learned, just from doing what you did every day. I learned by watching you...and now I gotta go Pop" He looked up and said to me "Another time and another place, my son." I was amazed...it brings tears to my eyes just trying to write these words. I actually got 3 lucid statements out of him...for again...it too will be the last time I will ever see him

The blessing I have to take away from all this is...at least I got the chance to say goodbye. Many in the world never get the chance...and I just did.

For all the wonderful postings, sympathy, support, as well as the heart felt PMs from the lot of ya...I have just one thing to say.

Thank You...and that really isn't enough in my book....yo brotha'.......

and so it goes.

i'm glad you were able to say goodbye. none of the moments in the past have been destroyed. they have not gone anywhere, you are just moving further through time. you are still together then.

i spoke to my own mother before reading this post, which already had me thinking of those who have passed in my life. getting old is quite a thing....

This must be a difficult time for you and I hope you will feel better as soon as possible.

The act of feeling complete in life, is to leave nothing unsaid, nothing undone, no regrets...just...complete.

I say you did it right.

a cleansed soul...

Greg

Take care of yourself over the difficult times ahead.
Sounds like you're approaching this with as positive an attitude as is possible.
I know that it's all virtual, but there is a lot of love and respect coming to you from this forum. If people don't respond to your message it's because they don't know how, not because they don't care.
Peace to you and your family,
Ben

Ben said it. With you man.

I wasn't there to send my dad off.. and wouldn't have known what to do even if I could at the time.. since then many relatives have passed, and each time as I become more familiar with death, i think about how I would send the remaining when the time comes. I still have no idea. I think it's amazing how you dealt with it.

Death of a loved one lingers.. it has been the unwelcome guest in my life for some time now, and in a certain way, twisted my personality, but I guess I've learned to coexist. I truly wish you and your family the best.

hang on joel

Strength & Honor Brotha' Man.........

That took a lot of guts