"this is why so many wars keep starting in the Balkans.."
"basically, what's in the news is existing completely divorced from connection to the actual history"
Well its a double-edged sword. I admit i am not sure if you mean that international wars were ignited in the Balkans (as some where) or if you are saying that international media do not focus enough on the reason behind the late conflicts in the balkans being history based.
Either way, there is one more thing i think should be highlighted, and that is how men in power use history to fufil their intentions, which is especially true regarding the balkans. Milosevic in example wasn't in need of international backing to start his wars, neither was the Kosovoan retaliation after 1999 backed up on an international scale. Men in power use history to trigger conflicts in their interest, also in a purely political/egocentric agenda.
The Ottoman period is ofcourse relevant, but only if you are constantly fed with propaganda denying you to "nullify" history, which i personally think is important for societies to progress. Blood for blood is prehistoric if you ask me (prehistoric is interestingly enough a widely used word, consisting of pre and historic, which indicates that history should have been nullified at some point in time. hm. and yes, Jimmy, i said nullified

), yet a lot of societys swear on keeping it a rule to follow, purely out of bloodthirst. This involves anything from death penalties to "equal justification" in lack of better words, such as tolerated civil "eye for an eye" policies.
I remember having a nightly conversation with a translator in the late 90s in "the Balkans", where i was kind of fed up with the stupidly childish revenge-policies of certain cultures. The talk drifted to being focused on WW II, and i explained how some of my relatives had been treated by the Nazis, how common it is these days for Germans to visit Norway as tourists or them moving here for that matter, and how Norwegians do not hold a grudge against Germans. The shock in the face of the translator was pretty convincing, whereby he uttered "so when are you having your revenge?".
My point is, if you keep focus on what happened in 1389 and not the future, and this is to be the guideline to follow, well you are fucked. You shouldn't ignore it, but neither should it be your guide, and needless to say there is a history before the Ottomans as well.
I say format c: and reinstall.
EDIT: refrased myself.
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.